Decisions! Decisions!

I am excited, a writer friend who read my writings when I started posting my poem online at Writers Cafe. She gave me honest critiques.

 

She’s going to read Hidden Temptation.  She promises, to be honest with my manuscript.

 

I read this blog post a few days ago  by  Darla G. Denton and she shared a list of publishers who are accepting unsolicited romance novels. Should I or shouldn’t I? Hum!

 

I sent another query  out this past Monday. The agent is new in the field. She requires writers to submit a query letter and the first five pages of their manuscript. Of course, I send it by email so I will only hear from her if she has an interest. It’s a waiting game. There’s plenty of time to hear back before my March 30th target date to self-publish.

 

Decisions! Decisions!

 

As I said previous I am impatient and if I do go with a publishing company it’s going to take time. From what I understand, I will still have to do my own marketing. Does anyone know different? The one thing with a publisher or agent my work will be well polished.  What do you think, would you self-publish or try the traditional way?

 

I’ll keep you posted.

 

 

 

Disclaimer: I completed Hidden Temptation, my first completed novel and this blog is a humble attempt to create interest in its debut. I am not a professional and this is no way an educational guide. I am merely sharing my writing experience, what I picked up reading other novels, and what I learned in the process of completing Hidden Temptation.

I hope my experience helps fellow writers create a higher quality of art. I do not presume that Hidden Temptation is perfect or of professional quality but I do believe it is close. Your opinions, thoughts, and feedback are most welcome. Please feel free to create an open thread and share thoughts, and opinions so that we can help each other grow as a community of writers.

What’s it All About?

This is a work in progress. It’s the blurb for the back of Hidden Temptation.  What do you think? I don’t think it will interest anyone.  I can write a story, tell a story and when I tell people what my book is about they say it sounds good.  Only it takes me like five minutes to tell them.

 

Hidden Temptation has fights, sexual abuse, erotic sex, family drama and an “oh wow ending”. Getting all that information in a few lines is the hard part. I want to tell you the whole thing. But if I did that you would have no reason to buy Hidden Temptations because you would have read it.

 

All advice is wanted and accepted.

 

Odette grew up in an abusive environment that created her commitment phobia. Her  family relationship is full of drama. She is close with her older sisters and mother  they refuse to mind their business and she refuses to heed their unsolicited advice about her lifestyle.  To protect herself from having her heart-broken Odette will only have sex with married men.

 

Wilhelm is recently divorced from his adulterous gold digging wife. To keep from paying her a lot in alimony he takes a leave of absence from his accounting firm and starts working for UPS. The first day on the job Wilhelm jumps right into the player’s arena.

 

Wilhelm meets Odette on the first day of his new job. They are attracted to each other but Wilhelm lacks the one thing that would make him attractive to Odette, a wife.

 

Will Wilhelm give up the chase or will Odette surrender to his charms?

 

 

Disclaimer:  I completed Hidden Temptation, my first completed novel and this blog is a humble attempt to create interest in its debut. I am not a professional and this is no way an educational guide.  I am merely sharing my writing experience, what I picked up reading other novels, and what I learned in the process of completing Hidden Temptation.

I hope my experience helps fellow writers create a higher quality of art. I do not presume that Hidden Temptation is perfect or of professional quality but I do believe it is close. Your opinions, thoughts, and feedback are most welcome. Please feel free to create an open thread and share thoughts, and opinions so that we can help each other grow as a community of writers.

Waste of Time

Throw that trash out, it’s not good enough!

Shut the hell up inner voice! All you’re trying to do is discourage me. Those words haunt me now and then. Do they haunt you too?

I worked hard on Hidden Temptation and most of the time I am confident it’s good. I believe once I put it out there people will want to read it. I dream about literary agents finding publishing houses that will have bidding wars over representing me. They will wine and dine me at exclusive for the filthy rich kind of restaurants. I dream of being on The New Time #1 best seller list. I dream of having blurbs in The Washington Post and The Chicago Tribune. Yes, I have huge dreams for Hidden Temptation.  I worked hard, why not?

In addition to those hubris thoughts, I cower in the corner and ask myself, who the hell do you think you are? Hidden Temptation is a pile of wasted time and effort. Only friends and family will buy it. Maybe, they might not be interested in it either. I think those who do write a review will write horrible one. I should just trash the whole thing. Write my poems post them on Silently Heard Once and do my arts and craft. My grandson asked me when I was going to finish crocheting his blanket. That’s what I should do, make my grandkids their handmade blankets.  Give up this novel-writing and stop wasting my time.

Those thoughts pop into my head now and then. A few months ago I saw this cartoon and I said maybe that’s me.

 

 

Found on Facebook

 

Some times I have this feeling that something great is in store for me. I wake up and think one day my dream are going to come true. Like I’ve said many times, ‘feelings, they come and go.’

Hidden Temptation is a love story it doesn’t have a profound hidden message. It’s just a fiction novel.  Maybe it is crap but I owe it to myself to put it on the market and let you guys decide. 

It is What it Was

A lesson I learned from blogging was to be aware of my tenses. For me, it was and still is a major hurdle for me to jump. I get confused and apparently the reader who pointed out I was mixing my tenses got confused too.

 

 

When I started Hidden Temptation I started writing it in the present tense. It proved to be a little difficult.  In Hidden Temptation, there are a few flashbacks, more like memories that are in the past tense. I’ve questioned other writers on a Facebook forum. I was told many writers mix their tenses in their novels. I, however, was mixing my tenses in the same sentences.  I guess that was why agents didn’t respond to my queries. I appeared to be a novice.  This was why I had to edit Hidden Temptation for the seventh time.

 

 

No matter how good your story line is, if you grammar isn’t correct you will have difficulty getting readers to read past the first page. Not completely true, because my friends who read Hidden Temptation didn’t mention it.  But then I discovered not all my readers were honest. I mentioned in an earlier post that I read a friend’s book with errors falling off the pages.  The writer told me their spouse edited for them. You would think your spouse would be honest.

 

 

After I took a couple of classes and read a few books. I wrote two screenplays about twenty years ago.  Writing a script was like writing a short story.  I learned that one page equals one minute.  You have twenty minutes, give or take to capture a viewer’s attention. If you fail to pique their interest in that time they will probably change the channel.

 

 

I don’t know how many pages an average reader will read before they close a book, they deem poorly written.  I’m not an average reader because I will continue to read a poorly written story and one not too compelling because I’m attached to the characters and/or the writer introduced the dilemma early. I would read a poorly written book to the end because my curiosity was piqued. I would shake my head and re-write as read though.

 

So tell me, do you read poorly written books because you want to find out what happens? Do you have difficulty with tenses? Do you have any tricks to help you correct your tenses?

 

Visit next Tuesday I’m going to tell you about

Disclaimer:  I completed Hidden Temptation, my first completed novel and this blog is a humble attempt to create interest in its debut. I am not a professional and this is no way an educational guide.  I am merely sharing my writing experience, what I picked up reading other novels, and what I learned in the process of completing Hidden Temptation.

I hope my experience helps fellow writers create a higher quality of art. I do not presume that Hidden Temptation is perfect or of professional quality but I do believe it is close. Your opinions, thoughts, and feedback are most welcome. Please feel free to create an open thread and share thoughts, and opinions so that we can help each other grow as a community of writers.

Unnecessary Words

I read this blog post on Shirley McLain’s blog. Words to Seek Destroy in Your Writing. She shares a lot of writing tips. I’m sharing this particular piece because during my editing I found that I use but, yet, however often and those words are really unnecessary.  I use those words in conversation. I use them when I write my blog post. I’m aware of it and make corrections accordingly. After reading Shirley McLain’s article, I found that I use another word that isn’t needed. THEN.

 

So, oh wait I don’t need to write “so”. I’m telling a story and as I write it should be clear that after this happens that happens. It’s not needed to go from one action to the next. Check out these sentences.

 

1. I took the garbage out then went to the store.
2. After I took the garbage out I went to the store.My First Edit

 

In my opinion, I think sentence B flows better.  What do you think? This is a quick fix. I’m using the ‘find’ feature to look for ‘then’ and edit.

 

Jackie over at To Breathe is to Write said on my post My First Editing  “editing is a good thing, but you need to quit it at some point and just put it out there.” She is absolutely right. I know Hidden Temptation will never be perfect. I want it to be, I would like to find all the errors.  I know I won’t. I can only hope that with my next projects I will use all the things I learned while completing and editing Hidden Temptation. Hoping my first draft will be more polished when I begin my first edit. A dollar and a dream is all it takes to win the lottery. It’s possible, right?

 

After publishing Pages of Pain and Whispers I Silently Heard I found errors.  I was distraught, I felt guilty or maybe it was shame for those who  purchased copies of my books  with  errors. A few weeks ago I edited both my books of poetry.  I know I can do this with Hidden Temptation when and if I find errors later. I would like to avoid that though. People will spend good money, I hope, for Hidden Temptation. I don’t want them to be disappointed.  I believe if I present a near perfect product people won’t mind spending on the next one.  I’m thinking it’s like going to a restaurant and getting food poisoning, you aren’t likely to go back. If you had a meal that was lip-smacking good you’ll go back without hesitation.

 

Following Jackie’s advice, I decided to give myself a target date March 30^th, 2016 to release Hidden Temptation. I asked Dwight Garland the artist who created the cover for Whispers I Silently Heard to help me with the cover for Hidden Temptation. I’m giving him a deadline. I’m not paying him. His compensation is expanding his portfolio. So I can’t really rush someone who is doing me a favor.

 

 

Have you written a book?  How many edits did you personally do?

 

Visit next Tuesday I’m going to tell you about It is What it Was

Disclaimer:  I completed Hidden Temptation, my first completed novel and this blog is a humble attempt to create interest in its debut. I am not a professional and this is no way an educational guide.  I am merely sharing my writing experience, what I picked up reading other novels, and what I learned in the process of completing Hidden Temptation.

I hope my experience helps fellow writers create a higher quality of art. I do not presume that Hidden Temptation is perfect or of professional quality but I do believe it is close. Your opinions, thoughts, and feedback are most welcome. Please feel free to create an open thread and share thoughts, and opinions so that we can help each other grow as a community of writers.

What’s My Genre?

Hidden Temptation started as a romance novel. Odette my protagonist has some issues about falling in love, love is taboo for her.  The story would be boring if she didn’t right? She has sisters who are older, well you know sisters. You could imagine. No spoilers sorry. Odette has a job, a friend and a lover or two.

 

So how would I sub list that as genre Romance /family? There’s graphic sex in Hidden Temptation too. Those who can’t do it write about . . . no, I think it’s they teach. Well, I could do that too. Seriously my sex chapters (yes plural) are steamy and I considered toning them down. But thinking about Shades of Grey By E. L. James I thought maybe I should heat it up some more. But I won’t, in my opinion, Shades was smut, straight up porn. My sex in Hidden Temptation is pretty detailed I won’t lie. Maybe a wee bit perverted but they’re sprinkled throughout the book.  There is more story than body bumping.

 

Toward the end of Hidden Temptation, there is an incident that turns it into a who done it mystery.  So how do I classify my book, “A family saga with a who done it mystery, erotic love story.” Sounds a little confusing right? But life can be messy so Hidden Temptation is a little messy. If you were looking for sweet girl meets nice boy Hidden Temptation is not that book. Odette and Wilhelm are nice but they have baggage and love is not what either of them is looking for. It’s sex yep a spoiler they want sex and they get it. The question is do they have sex with each other? For that information, you will need to read Hidden Temptation to find out.

 

 

I read an article in Writer’s Digest that said many books in today’s market have crossover genre. Well, this is certainly true of Hidden Temptation.  I think I mentioned I started Hidden Temptation with an idea. I saw the name Wilhelm in a book I was reading years ago and I liked the spelling, just as simple as that he was going to be my antagonist.  The original title was, Surrendering to Desire or Tempting Desire. One of my beta readers suggested Hidden Temptation.
As I started writing Hidden Temptation my muse, who really needs a name, decided to go  in a different direction. Julia, that’s my going to be my muse’s name. Julia got me excited and I ran behind her trying to catch up with her ideas. The end result is a body of work I am extremely satisfied with and can’t wait to share. Are you excited? What do you think about the genre based on the little info I shared?

 

©Kimberly Wilhelmina Floria

1/22/16

 

I think my twist I have good conflict and everything connects.  I think I told a good story and I think I told it well.  Well, it is mostly a story told around mental and physical attraction so I guess the genre is Romance.

 

Visit Thursday I’m going to tell you about Unnecessary Words

 

Disclaimer:  I completed Hidden Temptation, my first completed novel and this blog is a humble attempt to create interest in its debut. I am not a professional and this is no way an educational guide.  I am merely sharing my writing experience, what I picked up reading other novels, and what I learned in the process of completing Hidden Temptation.

I hope my experience helps fellow writers create a higher quality of art. I do not presume that Hidden Temptation is perfect or of professional quality but I do believe it is close. Your opinions, thoughts, and feedback are most welcome. Please feel free to create an open thread and share thoughts, and opinions so that we can help each other grow as a community of writers.

Introducing Characters

I  like to introduce my characters to my readers and I want my readers to know who each my characters are and remember them. I do it slowly and individually.  I think if I threw out a bunch of characters all at once my reader would get confused. I know you guys are smart but if you suffer from CRS (can’t remember shit) like I do, you lose track of who is who as you read.  I have gone back in books to  look up a character that was introduced earlier in the book to try to remember who they are. My goal was/is to make my characters memorable so you don’t have to go back and figure out who they are. I know good luck with that, right?

 

 

In Hidden Temptation, I know who my characters are and how everyone is connected to my protagonist, Odette. I know what’s going on and I want my readers to  be able to follow effortlessly. There are many folks in Odette’s life but I don’t think there are too many. She has her parents, siblings, co-workers, and of course, her lovers. Some people are insignificant and just get an honorable mention.  But they may return in the sequel Revealing Temptation.

 

 

Have you ever gone to a party with a friend and get introduced to a bunch of people at one time. For me, I tend to forget who everyone is until I have a personal encounter that would help me become familiar with them. Later when my friend and I talk about the party she would say something like remember Nancy, she was the one in the low-cut yellow sweater and kept giggling loud. Now I remember who Nancy was.

 

 

During one of my editing’s I focused on character development. I tried to give distinct voices and little habits that would ease them into my reader’s subconscious. It was my goal to gently bring you into the world of Hidden Temptation. I know how it was going to end and how all the characters and plots connect.  My task, I believe is taking you on a journey with me. I hope I bring you along without rushing to the end. I think I did a good job. The only way to be sure will be for you to read Hidden Temptation when it’s released.

 

 

I have scenes in Hidden Temptation where six or more people are talking but think I wrote it so everyone would be easily identified and my readers would know who everyone was without getting confused. I don’t think I should have tons of characters in a 278-page book. Have you ever read a script or even the credits after a movie?  You may have noticed characters that are needed to make a scene believable but aren’t essential for the story so they didn’t get names. Characters like store clerks or  cashiers. I don’t think nameless characters take anything away from the storyline. But as creator, to my novel world, I know everyone’s name. Did that sound ominous? Okay, I still need work on descriptions, a discussion for another post.

 

 

As I work on this 7^th edit I’m tweaking little habits and distinguishing telltale traits for my characters. Like you know would know when a character was lying without me spelling it out because that character does  the thing every time they tell a lie.

 

 

I read some years ago, I don’t remember where but  if you show it’s effortless for the reader to follow you. I wanted to engage my reader in my story.  Between the following two examples which do you think tells and which shows the action?  And why do you think so? How can we improve on showing? Let’s discuss it in the thread.

1. She was so angry it showed on her face and she quickly walked away from him.
2. She put her hands on her hips, cut her eyes and twisted her lips,  threw her hands in the air and stomped away from him shaking her head from side to side.

I’m not perfect, oh so very far from it.  I’m editing Hidden Temptation for the 7th time because there is always something needing tweaking. I’m editing for the 7th time because I can’t afford to pay someone to edit for me.  I have a retired principal that offered to critique but she just embarked on a new romance. Why read a romance when you can live a romance right?

 

 

My other friends and family who read Hidden Temptation have pointed out this or that but tend to ignore major flaws.  One person said there are some typos but your publisher will help you with those. Right!  I have to get a publisher. A person not in the writing world doesn’t know how hard it is for an unknown to get an agent no less a publisher.  I had people in a wide range of ages and backgrounds read Hidden Temptation and they find it interesting and engaging. But I think they don’t want to hurt my feelings or that I can’t handle the truth so they don’t point out what they see wrong. I have a writer friend who published on Amazon recently, the story is good but there are so many typos I wanted to highlight it for them.  When I mentioned it I was told their spouse edited it for them. I told them, if they don’t want to take heed, then that it is on them.  For me I want to know.  I want my book to be in the best possible shape. Tell me what you see wrong.

 

 

 

©Kimberly Wilhelmina Floria

01/21/16

 

Visit next Tuesday I’m going to tell you about What’s My Genre?

Disclaimer:  I completed Hidden Temptation, my first completed novel and this blog is a humble attempt to create interest in its debut. I am not a professional and this is no way an educational guide.  I am merely sharing my writing experience, what I picked up reading other novels, and what I learned in the process of completing Hidden Temptation.

I hope my experience helps fellow writers create a higher quality of art. I do not presume that Hidden Temptation is perfect or of professional quality but I do believe it is close. Your opinions, thoughts, and feedback are most welcome. Please feel free to create an open thread and share thoughts, and opinions so that we can help each other grow as a community of writers.